July 2010
247 posts
Improvisation: chicken makhani from leftover grilled chicken. Made my own butter from cream. Kickin it 19th century (with a stand up mixer).
Further evidence that @MollydeA is not a man. On Christina Hendricks: “She doesn’t do anything for me.”
AKA panties-moistener. “@SoBBolton: Scarf wall! http://tweetphoto.com/35660542”
My 9yo has made a cat o’ nine tails out of zipties. Not sure what she’s done with the rest of the dungeon equipment.
Woke up with a headache. Anyone know a good trepannist?
Alternative headache cure: 9yo made me frozen waffles w/ fresh blueberries (& “Creeping Death” on shuffle).
Off to Atlantic City to meet my 2nd cousin @AmyCarewSturgis. Odds that her kid says something hilarious/inappropriate: 2:5. Book it.
RT @ggreenwald: So the WikiLeak-ed documents might put Afghans at risk? You know what else does? 10 yrs of bombings, air raids, checkpoi …
Exploring my sexuality: singing “This Charming Man” at the top of my lungs with the windows down.
I find that my meat is especially succulent after I’ve been brined for a few hours.
RT @DFlaglerBerry: I hope 35,000 people in red shirts choke on prawn sandwiches tonight.
Sign of impending midlife crisis? Man driving 97 Civic thinks late model Camaro, Mustang are “cool.” Further evidence: toupee.
I really don’t want to comment on a professional woman’s wardrobe, but WTF with those pants, Julie Foudy? Fruit Stripe gum endorsement?
Accidentally poured second cup of coffee today. Intentionally drank it. Regretfully feeling it. Fatigue, cravings, shame.
RT @Gilly_Dearest: @MollydeA The mgr of Javamoon Cafe at the Newark Airport told her employees to clean the place up ‘real good’ b/c the …
A great feeling: when you realize that sound/smell is coming from someone else’s car.
Am I the only hipster (or quasi-hipster) in America who thinks the National and the Hold Steady are the two worst bands on Earth?
I just @-replied to a twitter message in < 15 seconds, complete with curly braces. I don’t have a problem. You have a problem.
RT @dangerroom: My War, WikiLeaked: Why the Public (and the Military) Can’t Count on Those Battle Logs http://bit.ly/aFOJuB
Take that, @discographies! “@kristinirene: @rolando pink flag truly is infinitely better… #wire”
I know I’m supposed to love the first three Wire albums equally, but Pink Flag is a straight-A student who will care for me in my dotage.
Your Facebook friends seem even more retarded when they’re in Flipboard’s grandiose UI.
Thanks everyone for your fiction recs. I went with @Sara_Laughs’ primary suggestion first, because she was vaguely threatening.
Can I get a litter or sedan chair at the corner of CP West and 81st in 10 mins?
Took the kids canoeing yesterday. Was well aware the entire time that I was the alert little man in the canoe.
I need to read some fiction. Recommendations?
Me: Which do you think us better, Elf or The Jerk? 9yo: Oh, that’s hard.
RT @sucittaM: Me: Can we have sex?
Wife: Did you clean the kitchen?
Me: Are we gonna have sex in the kitchen?
Wife: No.
Me: We are getti …
Via @PhillyUnionTalk, the spoons are at the snack bar. http://tinyurl.com/37fvmoc
Watching a 6yo pour cereal is like watching a dog try to play piano.
RT @ggreenwald: Very insightful points from @Jayrosen_NYU on WikiLeaks & why it frightens so many officials & their media spokespeople: …
I just unfollowed an American soccer fan for using the word “dodgy.” Let that be a lesson to the rest of you rubbish wankers.
Coverage of the Afghanistan documents will focus on @wikileaks itself and what the material means for (cont) http://tl.gd/2oi2iq
Mind Hacks (the blog) is brilliant and @vaughanbell’s twitter stream ain’t too shabby either. http://tinyurl.com/29o5vsf
Geese or deer. I’d eat either. Local, organic, lean meat. Probably tough as nails. http://tinyurl.com/2fomud8
There’s going to be a Stretch Armstrong movie, starring the werewolf from Twilight. He’s not blond, but he is made of rubbery plastic.
If you get a few hours, read Dave Eggers’ Zeitoun. It will help erode any remaining faith you have in our democracy.
Just got around to reading this @ggreenwald piece about the banal ways in which media use anonymous sources. Fun! http://j.mp/bmjAxS
There aren’t enough movies about the Holocaust.
Made an ass of myself today, start to finish. Hoping to cap it off by burning dinner, insulting our guests, watching Mad Men.
As I was falling asleep, the following came to me: “the woman’s eyes were set high and wide. Why? For the cheese.” Like a holy text, that.
I’m out buying underpants. Anybody want anything?
I hope that cicada gets tinnitus.
I never wake up in a bad mood but right now I want to throw batteries at Santa Claus and then profanely mock his neck injury.
Reading Zeitoun on a Saturday night. Because I want to ruin my evening.
RT @courtside: What in the name of Kim Kardashian kind of car is this?? http://twitpic.com/27zbbu
Annals of good parenting: watching my girls play virtual quarters on the iPad.
I know it’s hot outside but it’s a lot cooler inside the van, kids.
“Calm down and go lie down over there. I’m tired.” -Me, to my dog 5min ago. Also, women to their husbands all the time.
Getting up early means I can use the can with the door open. That’s the sound of freedom.